SELF LOVE AND SELF WORTH:(Learn To Love You First PT 2)
LOVE YOURSELF FIRST AND EVERYTHING ELSE WILL FALL INTO LINE. YOU REALLY HAVE TO LOVE YOURSELF TO GET ANYTHING DONE IN THIS WORLD….Lucille Ball.
Self love or ‘love of self’ or ‘regard for one’s own happiness or advantage’ is best explained as a basic human necessity. And some have expressed it to be a moral flaw akin to vanity and selfishness.
Self worth is an emotional state of being that comes from self understanding and self love and self acceptance. It is a state that is somewhat timeless and unchanging. It is a direct measure of how you value and regard yourself in spite of what others may say or do.
Hmmm!
This is going to be a fun article but I will try as best as I can to make you feel what I will be sharing and not just read the words.
You see, a lot of people if not everyone on earth, every being even the ones that have died has at one point or another felt some kinda doubt about themselves.
We’ve had to doubt our being, ourselves and our worth.
Some people would feel the need to celebrate an important moment in their lives or careers but something keeps holding them back. A nasty little voice somewhere in their heads or hearts is telling them that it isn’t right to celebrate when others aren’t. We have all been there, we have all had a moment or two of self doubt but what we didn’t know and to an extent still don’t know is that it is very very very much okay to celebrate when everyone isn’t and that is because we may not get the opportunity to do it again or any time soon. It is okay to celebrate every moment, every win like it is the last.
Some individuals have the habit of putting every one first before themselves. They never consider or entertain the thought of putting themselves before any other person.
Like that quote at the begining of this episode said, if you don’t love yourself as you should, you will have nothing to give out.
Take note of the words below and let them sink into your hearts, accept them and start to live them:
Loving yourself isn’t being selfish.
Loving yourself isn’t vain.
Loving yourself isn’t a flaw.
So, take some time out, give yourself some good loving because it is only when you truly love yourself that you’ll realize your self worth.
I used to be one of those people who put other people first.
I would put everyone else’s happiness first.
I would put their comfort first.
I would put their satisfaction first.
I would always make sure that they are ALWAYS happy and cared for before I would even consider the possibility of loving me, or thinking of my own happiness or satisfaction. Sometimes I even feel like it isn’t really worth it. I was wrong to think that. If you also have these thoughts, you are wrong too!
That was the way for me. ‘Make others happy and you will be happy’. That’s what I would always tell myself. But was I happy though? The answer to that will be a big fat NO.
I was not happy.
I was the least happy person alive at the time.
I didn’t even know how to be happy for myself or how to begin to find my own happy place. I didn’t know how to look for my happiness, or how to find that thing that made happy.
So, I started avoiding people.
I Literally avoided everyone except from my mom and sister and even then, I didn’t give them the amount of attention they had gotten used to getting from me but I always made them aware of my presence. But besides that, it was all about me, me and me.
I spent so much time alone, took some time off work, eventually had to quit my job. I just stopped doing a lot of things I used to do that I would consider FUN.
I stopped going out, I stopped taking calls, I stopped calling. I just stopped doing things I had become so comfortable doing and instead I started doing things I hadn’t been doing for a while, things I really enjoyed doing. Things that used to make me so happy.
I started reading again.
I started writing again. I spent hours pouring out all of my emotions on ink, wrote some very beautiful stories, turned them into great movie script, and I tell you, I discovered what true happiness really is. I started loving everything about myself. I mean EVERYTHING! It was an amazing feeling, I must tell you. And then I also started noticing things about myself I didn’t even know about before then.
Some of the things I started doing was planning trips.
I started shopping online.
I did a lot of shopping, I bought everything I loved. Foot wears, dresses, handbags, sun glasses, wigs… I got them all.
I started working out, now let me tell you that I do not like working out, I do not enjoy it at all but what I love about working is the result. I was loving how I felt after my workouts, I slept better, ate better, I felt better, I was light on my feet and I was loving every moment of it.
I started going out, I started meeting people, I made new friends and some how I was strong and bold enough let go of some of the people who weren’t really relevant to me or my happiness at all. Mind you, these were people I thought and believed I needed at one point in my life, People I felt appreciated me but really they didn’t.
Please note that, I didn’t particular discard them, but I put all of them in a box and didn’t reach out to any of them for anything for a very long time. I let them come to me and if I feel the need to, I give them a little bit of my time, but I let it be my decision and at my own pace.
I started loving myself like I deserved to be loved and then I found my self worth. And today, I only do what makes me happy, I only accept what makes me happy, I only give out what I can and not what is expected of me. Because in the past, I was all about what people needed from me, what is expected of me, how I can satisfy this person and please that person and make those people happy but now I am all about doing what is best for me, satisfying myself first before any other person, pleasing myself and making me happy first before anything else and I have never been happier!
Take a moment and ask yourself some really relevant questions, some very important questions:
Are you Happy?
Are you really, genuinely happy?
Are you happy with the way your life is and how it’s going?
Do you like the company you are keeping? Do you like the people around you? Do they like you? Do they make you sane? Do they add value in your life in any way? Are you happy having them in your life?
Do you really enjoy the things you spend your time doing?
When you sleep at night, do you sleep peacefully? Or do you have some doubts about the things you had done during the day? Do you regret the actions you made, the things you did? The things you said? The things you accepted from people?
Do you enjoy the company you keep?
Are you happy being a people pleaser?
Are you satisfied with the answers to these questions?
If you aren’t satisfied with your answers, then you need to change a lot of things about yourself.
You need to start thinking of you first before any other person.
You need to stop being a people’s pleaser and instead please YOU.
You need to be satisfied with every aspect of your being.
You need to be at peace when you sleep at night and extremely happy to face a new day when it’s dawn.
Believe me when I say this, when you are able to ask yourself these questions, make the relevant changes and then begin to love yourself selfishly, then you will begin to see your self worth. You will be so happy and pleased with how better your life had become.
I hope I have been able to share Something really beautiful and insightful with you on today’s episode of A Moment With Jennie? And I hope my words have been a tool of motivation to at least one person reading this.
I will be leaving you with a beautiful quote by Andrew Mathews.
A healthy self love means we have no compulsion to justify to ourselves or others why we take vacations, why we sleep late, why we buy new shoes, why we spoil ourselves from time to time. We feel comfortable doing things which add quality and beauty to life.
Thank you so much for spending A Moment With Jennie, I hope to see you next time and share some more amazing time with you. Thanks for reading!
A Moment With Jennie 