Being Friends With Your Ex.

Being friends with your ex…

Hello!

Welcome to another exciting article on A Moment With Jennie. This article will be brief but very interesting to a lot of us. I hope my words will do justice to the topic. Enjoy!

I know a lot of people that will be quick to scream ‘NO’ at the top of their voices when they come across this topic. And I won’t blame them because who wants to remain friends with someone that caused and brought them so much pain and torture? But at the same time, I can’t tell you what to do here, I’ll only make suggestions and then urge you to make the right choice for yourself and for your sanity. Always make sure that whatever you decided to do in every situation is what’s best for you and your sanity.

Exes can make for good friends who know how to support, motivate, and care for you. However, each situation is unique. Don’t rush into it, ask yourself what you want from the friendship, and make sure your ex stays in the past when it comes to your romantic future….. Says Google(my best friend!)

Many people rely on being friends with their ex to ease the pain of a breakup. While a platonic relationship sounds like a great way to keep an ex in your life without being intimate, it can lead to several challenging situations.

Below are some questions you need to ask yourself before you make up your mind yo become friends with your ex:

1. What do I appreciate or value about my friendship with my ex? So many romantic relationships started with two people who were very close friends, some may have even been best friends for years. They have had to rely on each other for so many things over the years and it may be really hard for them not to remain friends after they break up. They feel safer and more comfortable with this person. They can talk and express themselves to this person in every way and not feel judged. So they bank on this sense of security and comfort and decided to remain friends after breaking up.
2. How long has it been since the breakup?; Well, after some time must have passed, some people feel comfortable talking to their exes again. They feel they have healed enough, or they have forgiven their exes, and they would not mind being friends with their ex because they feel they no longer have any residual romantic feelings towards them.
3. What will this friendship mean for your future romantic relationships?; Listen to me, No loving and caring partner will ever be happy hearing that their partner is in talking terms with their ex. They won’t ever want to believe that you are ‘just friends’ with an ex who may know you more than they know you. There is a high possibility of this being a big issue on your relationship. So if you ever decide to remain friends with an ex, also consider how your next partner will feel about that and if the case were to be reversed, how you would feel about it too. Regularly meeting or talking to an ex may signal to a new partner that you are not over them or are carrying baggage from an old relationship they may not want to deal with.Even if the new person is not put off by the friendship, you owe it to them to be sincere and present in the new relationship.

Let’s put it out there: They are your ex for a reason.
A breakup is a clear sign that your relationship did not work out in the way you hoped. You gave it your all but then walked back on your decision to be a couple.

You are not alone in wanting to be friends with your ex, and there is nothing inherently wrong with it. Exes can make for good friends who know how to support, motivate, and care for you. However, each situation is unique. Don’t rush into it, ask yourself what you want from the friendship, and make sure your ex stays in the past when it comes to your romantic future.

Okay, now that we have gotten over the feeling of why being friends with your ex may not be a great idea, let’s talk about why being friends with an ex may not be such a terrible idea. Below are a few points I’ve researched on and believe to be of help to people who are confused about whether or not they should be friends with their ex.

1.It’s the friendship that you miss, not sex with your ex;
Let’s get real: If you’re still reminiscing on the steamy times you shared together, it’s probably more of a recipe for a dumpster fire than a wholesome friendship. So if the reason you want to keep talking with your is because of the friendship you both had and shared, then yes. I recommend You keep them as friends. But if what you miss about them is the ‘great sex’ you once had, honey you need to lose their contact immediately because you will only be hurting yourself if you only want to hook up with them for sex.

2. You no longer think of them romantically; If while talking to them or thinking about them you no longer feel any residual feelings of love or romance, then you can be friends with them but if the opposite is the case, run away from that ex now!
3. The relationship ended on safe and not-overly-chaotic terms; I said it earlier, the kind of break up you had will determine how you heal and if you should remain friends with them or not. If it was not a dirty break up, or if it was a very clean breakup, then you can be friends. Because there is no feelings of anger or pain or hate. You can both talk to each other calmly without having urge to kill the other person in their sleep.

4.You’ve forgiven each other for anything that was hurtful;
If you both feel you have managed to forgive each other totally for hurting each other, and you feel you can get past all of that and be platonic friends, then you can be friends with your ex. But I’m still going to say this: If the break up was bad, dirty, painful, just avoid them all together and hope to never come across them again, for your own sanity.

5.The idea of them dating other people doesn’t make you feel like jealous; Well, this is hard one but if you are emotionally and mentally strong enough to deal with this, then go ahead. And if really, you are being sincere with yourself, they being a relationship with someone else does not affect you in any way or cause you pain or brings about the need to be jealous, then carry on with the ‘platonic friendship’.

6. If you don’t feel the constant need to stalk them or new partner on social media. Or if you don’t feel the urge to constantly call or text them to talk, then you can be friends with them.

But all in all, it is really hard being just friends with someone who was once more than friends with you. It’s even going to be harder hearing them talk about someone other than you with so much adoration and love. It will definitely be hard having to endure constant reminders of your relationship and all that you both shared. It’s always going to be hard. That’s why I will strongly advise against remaining friends with an ex if they hurt you badly and if you suffered a great deal of pain because of them. Always think of you first before anything and anyone else. Always think of your sanity, your happiness in all that you do. And stop falling victims to your own lies. Don’t lie to yourself believing you can remain friends with an ex when you still have feelings for them because then you will only end up hurting yourself and make a big fool of yourself.

Again, I really hope these words help someone make a wise decision for themselves today regarding this matter. And remember; ” AN EX IS AN EX FOR A REASON. LEAVE THEM IN THEIR BOX AND NEVER TAKE THEM OUT AGAIN IF POSSIBLE “.

Thank you for spending A Moment With Jennie. Let’s meet again and spend more intimate time together in the next article. Thanks for reading!