Why Walk Away Instead Of Finding A Solution?

Why Walk Away Instead Of Finding Solutions?

Hello!

Welcome to another beautiful article on A Moment With Jennie. This is a very sensitive topic, someone wanted me to write on it and due to the person’s experience in their current relationship, I’ll try to be as gentle as I can because there are a lot of people going through same thing. Judging them or making them feel stupid for walking away from a situation that has threatened to break them down mentally won’t help them heal from their pain. So I really hope to be of help to this person and the people also suffering from same issues with my words of advice in this article. Enjoy!

So this person talked to me extensively about the issues they are currently facing in their relationship. Apparently, their partner has this terrible habit of not paying attention to whatever advice given to them especially if it’s about financies or family related issues which are very important issues. Money and family are very important. And this person is always pained that they are in a relationship with someone that literally ignores them time and again and will instead listen to other people and whatever advice they have to give. But when things don’t work out my friend is always the one who has to pick up the pieces. And now my friend seems to have had enough and wants to end the relationship. My friend feels walking away from this toxicity is what’s best for their mental health. They have complained and tried to talk to their partner repeatedly but same thing keeps happening over and over again and they are just tired. My friend feels like their opinion does not matter to their partner in the relationship, there is no need to continue with the relationship.

N.B: They have actually made up their mind to end it, so this is not a cry for help or anything.

Like I said earlier this is a very sensitive issue and that topic is just perfect for this discussion. Because a relationship where one party ignores the other for whatever reason is not a relationship that’s going to work. Staying in that relationship will only harm your mental health. This person has proven to you time and again that your opinion does not matter to them. They have made you feel insignificant in your relationship time and again. They have belittled you, your relationship and your words, they have in so many ways told you that your words mean nothing to them. Then you need to not just walk away, you need to run as fast as you can because your mental health and your self esteem are both in danger in the hands of this individual.

Understandably, a lot of couples go through different issues while in a relationship. It could be finance, it could issues with sex or endurance or anything at all. The truth is that, once you make up your mind to be in any romantic relationship or comitted relationship, get ready to be tested in every way possible. Get ready to be put to the test. Your patience will be tested, your heart will be tested, you endurance level will be tested, everything will be tested time and again. How you deal with all of that is now left to you. And if these tests keep repeating , you will be forced to decide if you want to remain in the relationship or if you want to walk away. But one thing need to noted though, you can not walk away without putting in the work. No, let me rephrase; you SHOULD not walk away without putting in the work first. Patience is really a virtue, you will get the chance to fully understand that when you get into a romantic or comitted relationship or even you get married, especially when you get married. You can always break up with a partner that moves mad regularly but you can’t just wake up one morning and say you want to walk out of your marriage. How? Where are you going to? Are those vows you made at the alter a joke to you? Those are the trials you vowed to endure and connqeuer. So stay back, endure them and conqeuer them. But it is a totally different issue for couples who are yet to be married but are in very serious romantic relationships. It may hurt, it may anger you, it may frustrate you but really the pain will go away, eventually. If you don’t walk away when you can, believing that the person will change after marriage, you are only setting yourself up for greater pain and heart ache because it is only going to get worse.

I always say this; Before going into any relationship, ALWAYS know what you want, first!
Know yourself and then know your partner. This is what the talking stage is for. It’s more than just asking about your favorite music or artists, or movie or actor… It is also about going deeper and knowing who they really are and what they like or hate, know their depths. Are they temperamental? Are they violent? Is he or she the kinda person you can be with?

There are different reasons a person will decide to leave a relationship. There are lots of problems with many ‘happy’ relationships we see today, you don’t know the real problems because you are not a part of of the relationship. They only let you see the beautiful icing on the cake. You don’t know what the cake actually tastes like. There are certain problems in relationships that the only solution to them is to walk away. That’s the best solution. Just walk away and live your life as far away as you can from that person. And one of these reasons is abuse, could be mental, emotional or physical abuse or all three. The person needs to walk away. My friend is going through emotional and mental abuse with their partner. A partner that ignores you and your words of advice which are always the right ones and instead take advice of other people is a partner that does not care enough or respect you enough and you need to leave that person before they destroy your self esteem and mental health.

Try to recognize the problem. Which is where communication comes in. If you talk to your partner repeatedly about something, caution them even and they still ignore you, then really, stop trying. You have done all you can. Because if your partner respects you, they will listen to your words and take them seriously.

And we always want to make things about us, ourselves only, which is wrong. When we communicate, we try to just express ourselves and our own problems and then we fail to listen to the other person and then understand them. And that’s why it is very Important to work on ourselves separately before coming together. I can’t be your happiness or help you find it. You are supposed to do that on your own. And I should not expect you to help me find mine. We are each responsible for our own happiness. We can only add to what the other already has. That’s the truth we must know and accept and learn to live it.

And sometimes, depending on the individual, when they fail to listen or seem like they are ignoring us, it is a result of fear. Fear has a way of controlling our actions.
And then we also need to think of what the problem is…
Walking away from a relationship for issues like, she’s dirty, she can’t cook, he’s dirty, he’s disorganized, he doesn’t know how to clean up after himself, he doesn’t call me often, she takes hours to reply me…. These issues can be solved, easily. Express your concerns and anger and pain and hurt and then come to a compromise. Because relationship is about give and take, which means there must always be a compromise. Everybody must be ready and willing to compromise at least once because we can’t always have it our way. We need to bend for the other, cave in at least once, on certain issues.

That’s it for now readers! Thank you for spending A Moment With Jennie again! Let’s meet again and spend more intimate time together in the next article. Thanks for reading!

Oral Sex:

Oral Sex:

Hello!

Welcome to another interesting topic on A Moment With Jennie. A lot of people will love this one, I know that for a fact. Let’s relax and enjoy this article the best way we can. Enjoy!

Oral sex or cunnilingus or fellatio or anilingus:
Sexual contact between the mouth and the genitals or anus.

Cunnilingus: Stimulation of the vagina or clitoris with the mouth. This usually includes sucking or licking outside and around the vulva.

Fellatio: Stimulation of the penis with the lips, tongue, or teeth. It usually involves a sucking or licking motion, but may also include the use of the throat or teeth.

Anilingus: Stimulation of the anus with the mouth or lips.

Who does not love to have oral sex performed on them? Every one loves it. Everyone enjoys it! Everyone craves it, both men and women. So what is the problem really? Why are People constantly shying away from sex talks and especially if it is oral sex. These are acts you engage in and enjoy, why are you shy or embarrassed or ‘disgusted’ to talk about them?

Oral sex is a gift! Accept it and appreciate it. Be grateful for it! Someone has to really be into you for them to put their mouth in/on your genitals. So if someone decides to go down on you, you better be grateful for the gift and also return the favour for the love of peace and unity.

That’s the next thing I’ll be talking about. A lot of men find it hard to go down on their women. They find the act ‘disgusting’ but wants her to go down on them because they enjoy it. How selfish is that? How selfish can you be to only want to be at the receiving end of something so pleasurable and never want to give back the same pleasure you are getting?

Oral sex is sexual activity involving the stimulation of the genitalia of a person by another person using the mouth or throat, and may take various forms…. Says Google.

Oral sex is a form of foreplay, a prelude to actually having sex. But you must first talk to your partner before engaging in it. You must be comfortable with it and your partner must be comfortable with it too. Don’t go about expecting it from someone you have not even talked about it with. And it should never be forced. It should be something that should be given freely. We must always see it as a gift and not a chore because otherwise, what’s the fun in it?

Let’s quickly walk back to the topic of sex itself before we continue on this particular topic. Growing up and meeting people, it’s become more and more evident that a lot of people consider sex to be a chore. An obligation, a duty you must perform especially as married couples. That’s so sad. Sex should not be seen as a chore or a duty, because then it defies its purpose. It’s supposed to be fun and enjoyable, it is supposed to bring you bliss and pleasure. When you have sex out of a sense of duty, there will be little to no enjoyment in it for you. And your partner may feel worse after the act. There will be no reaction, no responses, just two bodies coming together with zero affection or enthusiasm.

I can’t understand why people will look at sex as a chore or a task or a duty. Married couples have it worse. I understand there are days you don’t have the urge to have sex, but you feel the need to just to satisfy your spouse. Which is why communication is required in every relationship. We can’t be in a relationship and not communicate properly. If we are a couple, we should be able to talk about every thing down to our moods. We need to able to share, communicating is also sharing. You talk about your fears, your shame, your anger, your goals, your pains etc. You also have to talk about your sexual urges or lack of it. Again, life is way too short to not be able to enjoy every part of it.

One of the beauties of oral sex is that, with or without actual sex, you can attain sexual pleasure or orgasm. So for married couples, on the days where one of you is too lazy to have sex or just not in the mood to have sex and the other is turned and can’t seem to quench their desire, oral sex is an option. Go down on them, or have them go down on you. Being able to pleasure your spouse/partner should be fulfilling. You have to feel the pleasure of it, knowing that with just one touch or one act, you can bring them to their knees, you can bring them pleasure and bliss.

Let’s also talk about how enjoyable oral sex is. A lot of people will swear they prefer oral sex to the act of sex itself. And that is very understandable especially for women. There are things the tongue of your partner could do to you that his penis could never achieve even if it goes on and on for hours. The tongues is soft but pleasurable, it brings a kind of pleasure and is so hard to even describe. There are various ways to pleasure a woman with your mouth while you can only pleasure a woman with your penis in just one way. You can suck, lick, nibble with the tongue. The right word should be ‘feast’ which has a way of literally driving her mad. Men who refuse to go down on their women are mean and wicked and selfish.

Oral sex is both pleasurable for the giver and receiver. You feel powerful and beautiful while giving or receiving oral sex as a woman. And as a man, you feel like a king, a warrior while going down on her.

And as pleasurable as oral sex is, there is also the risk of contracting an STD/STI through this act which is something a lot of people are ignorant about. Fluids are being exchanged during oral sex. Which is a very effective way of getting an STD transfered from one person to another. Which is why having casual sex should always be a ‘No-No’. Avoid it at all cost! Stay safe. A healthy life is bliss. It is a blessing knowing that you don’t have to constantly worry about what drugs to take for this diseases or that one.

Some people are opposed to oral sex due to cultural or religious reasons. While others are simply ignorant as to how much they are missing out by openly condemning the act because they ‘feel repulsed’ by the thought of it. I bet you if they ever get the chance to try it once, they will be hooked for life and they will feel stupid for the many times they condemned the act and the people involved in it.

If you are new to the act of oral sex and you don’t know how or what to do, ask questions. Have your partner direct you on what to do. Read books and watch videos. Don’t go about using your teeth where your teeth has no business being. This especially goes to the ladies, a lot of men have had at least one painful experience of a woman using their teeth on their penis all in the name of giving them a blow job. And some men are new to performing oral sex on a woman, please ask questions and have her guide you on what to do. Don’t go about using saliva and too much tongue where you are not supposed to. Don’t nibble when you are supposed to lick and don’t lick when you are supposed to suck. Please ask questions and watch videos and read books to learn how to orally pleasure a man or a woman.

There are very special people going about thinking and believing that oral sex ‘is not’ sex. Then they proceed to perform and receive oral sex from different people, believing that they are not having sex and basking in their ignorance of ‘oral sex not being sex’. You need to wake up and read and know and understand that if it involves the genitalia, it is sex! If it involves your sexual organs, it is sex! And really though, it is called ‘oral sex’, key word being SEX! COME ON!

And there are a lot of people who believe they can’t get any sexually transmitted diseases through the act of oral sex, that’s a big lie you are telling yourself. I said it earlier, oral sex also involves the release and exchange of body fluids. Which is an effective way of getting an STD. Experts say, although the chances if this happening may be low, there is still a high possibility of it happening.

Oral sex should not be a topic to shy away from or an act that repulses you or disgusts you. If you don’t want to engage in it, that’s fine but refrain from condemning other people enjoying the benefits of this act. And I would especially recommend this to married couples who are yet to see the beauty in this. It’s a fast way to spice up your sexual life and help you stop seeing sex as a chore or a duty to perform without fail.

That’s it on this topic. In what ever we do, let us try to stay safe abd be careful of our sexual partners. Thank you for spending A Moment With Jennie, let’s meet again and spend more intimate time together in the next article. Thanks for reading!

Casual Sex For Singles:

Having Casual Sex:

Hello!

Welcome to another exciting article on A Moment With Jennie. This one is going to be another brief article but hopeful very enlightening too. We will be discussing the increase in casual sex or ‘hook up’ sex as it is commonly called these days out in the world today, the reasons behind these acts and some of the dangers involved in it. Enjoy!

Casual Sex:
People may define casual sex as sexual interactions that take place outside a committed relationship. Often, these encounters occur between individuals without any expectation of a future romantic relationship. Casual sex may cover a variety of sexual and intimate behaviors, up to and including sexual intercourse….. Says Google.

The write up above sums up what casual sex is. But what I really want to talk about in this article is the rate at which people are choosing casual sex over romantic relationships. The constant increase in the amount of people having casual sex these days is alarming. What’s worse is that, once a conversation starts between two adults, one party already expects the other to initiate a conversation about sex. It’s become a norm for young adults these days. Literally, almost every body is engaged in casual sex. It’s really a sad thing to see. There’s way too much love in the world for people to choose to live their lives this way. And while I can empathize with many as to why they chose to live this way, I still have to condemn the act itself and talk about how wrong it is.

Why do People choose to engage in the act of casual sex:

  1. Heart Break: A lot of individuals have experienced very terrible breakups from previous relationships. Or have witnessed people close to them have terrible partners that eventually lead to a bad break up. And as a result, they try to stay away from romantic relationships. Because they feel every relationship comes with a heart break. Well, it’s true that there is no guarantee of a happy ending in every relationship but it is also wrong to give it a try and in the case of some people, keep trying until you get it right. Most people who engage in the act of casual sex just want to avoid the eventual or looming heart break that comes with being in a romantic relationship.
  2. Zero Expectations: This is where the ‘no strings attached’ term comes in. For people who feel they are not ready for serious relationships or who feel they don’t want the hassle of having a romantic partner, casual sex is the answer to their sexual needs. Because with casual sex, there are zero expectations. Both parties involved already know what they are getting into and they also know not give more than is necessary and not to expect anything in return. So for them, it’s a win-win.
  3. No stress: We all know being in a romantic relationship comes with a lot of work, really hard work. Not too many people are ready to put in that work. Not too many people are confident enough in the people they meet to bother going all in and putting in the work in order to make the relationship a success. So they opt for the option of casual sex with someone or People who have same goal as them which is mostly not to get attached or expect a proposal. You don’t have nobody calling and asking where you are or who you are with or what you are doing. You just do you with strangers you probably won’t have to see again.
  4. A lot of people have just gotten tired of starting and ending relationships. The whole process of meeting someone new, get into the talking stage, get to know the person. Repeat same thing about yourself you have said to over a dozen people, repeating the whole process is just too much for them and they try to just stay away from all that or take a break from all that and just find a way to take care of their urgent sexual needs.
  5. A lot of people have casual sex after just getting out of a relationship in an attempt to get over their ex. They pour out all the anger and hate and pain into multiple sexual partners, trying hard to forget the memoties of their ex or the lost/broken relationship. This is a sad truth for a lot people. But guess what? 99.9% of the time, it never works. They may forget for a few minutes but then they are back with the memories that haunt them at night or during the day.
  6. Some other reasons people angage in casual sex is to work on their sexual skills, they believe having multiple sexual partners helps them hone in their sexual skills. Makes them become sex gods/goddesses. While some people use casual sex as an excuse to increase their self confidence or sexual confidence. Some use casual sex to reduce stress. Hmmm. Too many ‘reasons’ which to me are just excuses but, what do I know?

People that would rather be with multiple partners than one, casual sex is for you. Just invest all your time and energy in it and leave people who want something meaningful and amazing in relationships alone. If you know that staying faithful to one woman is impossible for you, just carry on with having multiple sexual partners and go home to an empty at night. If that’s going to make you happy, please carry on.

What are some of the risks involved in engaging in casual sex:

  1. STDs/STI: This has to be the biggest risk involved in having multiple sexual partners. Because you can’t always be 100% certain this person you are about to be intimate is healthy and clean. You can only be sure of yourself. And really though, you can’t be careful enough. So if you choose to be promiscuous and have multiple sexual partners, be prepared to treat yourself regularly for sexually transmitted diseases.
  2. For women, there is the risk of falling pregnant without knowing who the father is. No matter how careful you try to be as a woman, pregnancy is one thing you can’t ever prepare for because the body of a woman is constantly changing. Your ovulating period changes with your period and your hormones is whole different topic altogether. So while enjoying the freedom and fun in having casual sex with more than 1 person, be prepared to fall pregnant at least once and what happens if you can’t tell who the father is because there were too many men to even count!
  3. Whether you like it or not, there is always the risk of falling for one of your sexual partners. He/she may turn out to be more than what you expected. They become to you what an actual partner could be but may end up not feeling for you what you feel for them. Another heart break, in the worse way possible.
  4. Who’s to say you will enjoy sex with every person you meet? There is always the risk of not enjoying sex with this stranger. And then you end up asking yourself ‘why did I even bother?’. Go get a partner and work on your emotions, when you love Some or care about them and they love and care about you in return, sex with them will always be phenomenal.
  5. How about the danger of going home with a stranger who may end up hurting you or even killing you? What fun is there for you in that?

In summary, let’s avoid anything that will cause us harm in any way. Having casual sex may sound or seem fun but the risks involved are way too high with very little benefits. Life is way too short to spend without loving and being loved in return. Just hope and believe that you will find yourself a man or woman that will love you and care for you and appreciate you just as you will love them and care for them appreciate them. Being with one partner is pure bliss. Marriage may not be for every body but that still does not stop you from loving someone and being loved in return. Having casual sex is way to risky for anybody to even consider making it a lifestyle. Let’s be safe and let’s be and do better for ourselves.

I really hope that when you read this article, it will bring you one step closer to believing in love and wanting to experience it for yourself with the right person. I hope this article erases every plans you may have of wanting to engage in casual sex. And if you are already living the lifestyle, I hope this article helps you rethink your current choices and make better ones for yourself instead.

Thank you for spending A Moment With Jennie. Let’s spend more intimate time together in the next article. Thanks for reading!

Sexual Life/Experiences For Couples:

Sexual Life, Sexual Experiences For Couples:

Hello!

Welcome to another beautiful article on A Moment With Jennie. And as usual I will try as much as I can to use my words to help as many as I can to stop with what they are doing wrong in their relationships and start doing things better for themselves and their partners. Enjoy!

Why don’t people in relationships talk about sex? Why won’t you talk about sex with your partner? How else is he/she going to know about your preferences, your desires, your kinks/fetishes(if any), how will they know what turns you on/off? I really do not understand why people shy away from this topic. It’s not insulting, neither is it degrading. So why not talk about what you want!

First things first: Listen, Sex is very important in every romantic relationship and even more important in every marriages. Which is why you need to talk about it, discuss about it every chance you get. When the two people in a relationship are able to bring sexual satisfaction to each other, there really will be no use in looking for external sexual partners. Except of course for the unfortunate ones who can’t seem to let go of their cheating behaviour.

One thing you need to understand is that, sex is a two way street, you both need to be able to satisfy each other, enjoy the moment, love the process, and in the end, cherish the memories you create. And this can only be achieved if and when both parties involved know what the other person wants and likes and then work on giving it to them the best way they can and the best way to achieve that is by talking about it.

As a woman, you need to be vocal with your man about your needs and desires. Tell him the things he needs to do to you and your body and how to do them in order to bring you the pleasure you desire. Look, men feel a sense of achievement or accomplishment when they bring pleasure to a woman. Only a selfish man who is yet to understand what sex is goes after his own satisfaction and release without caring for the woman. A real man always puts his woman’s needs before his own. He wants to know that he is capable of bringing his woman maximum satisfaction in bed. He wants to feel like a man when he sees the look of bliss and satisfaction on her face after sex. Ladies, please don’t take that away from your man. Give him the pleasure of knowing that he can always bring his woman to orgasm.

As a man in a relationship, always listen to her. Hear her, hear her words, pay attention to the things she is passionate about and then proceed to do to her exactly what she has talked about. Be a little more creative with how you do them though. Let your mind go wild, it’s supposed to be a memorable experience for you both. Think of more creative ways to pleasure her. Every woman has the tendency to scream if the pleasure hits the right spot. Draw out those screams from her. Feel the pleasure she feels for you and because of what you are doing to her. Feel pride in knowing that she is feeling this way, screaming this much because of you and only you. Make her desire you and only you. Draw out the pleasure. Make it last and make it feel good.

That’s why when I wrote the article on ‘the talking stage’ I emphasized on taking your time to get to know each other properly. Your sexual desire and want is a huge part of who you are, know that, believe it and accept it. Talking about sex, discussing about your sexual desires, wants and expectations is also part of getting to know each, which means you have to talk about sex during the talking stage.

As a couple in a relationship or marriage, share ideas on how you can both satisfy each other better. Do research, read books, listen to podcasts, have open conversations with other couples(if you can) and learn more about each other’s body. Know what turns the other person on, be vocal when you need to be. Don’t shut your mouth and expect your partner to know what to do to you and your body all on their own.

During the talking stage, and the topic of sex comes up, men are quick to voice their preferences and what drives them crazy. They are not just trying to be vulgar or raw. No, they are being vocal about their needs and wants. They want you to drive them crazy too just as they want to please you. Listen to him. And work on being able to pleasure him just as he is already imagining the many ways he can and will drive you nuts with desire. There really is a sense of satisfaction and pride that comes with knowing that this man appreciates your body and loves the things that you do him mentally and physically.

There are countless ways to add to your sexual experiences as a couple in a relationship or as a married couple. I’ll share some very intimate but effect ways you can both help the sexual part of your relationship grow;

  1. Know your body: Past experiences with past sexual partners should be a good place to start. Remember the things they did that turned you on and also remember the things they did that turned you off. When you know and understand your body, you will know how to communicate your wants and needs and desires to your partner and tell them how you want it done, direct them on how they should go about bringing you the pleasure you crave and desire.
  2. Be vocal: Be very vocal about what you want and how you want it done. Be vocal about the things that turn you on and the things that are not likely to turn you off. Talk about the things that will bring you pleasure. Talk about things you would like to try out and why. Talk about a fantasy you would like to try out. Always be open with your partner, use your words to help them know you and understand your needs and also guide them on how they can achieve giving you these needs.
  3. Learn to be responsive: Don’t be shy to voice out your pleasure when something they are doing to you pleases you. Don’t hold in the moan and never hold in the scream. If he/she hits the right spot or touches in a way that turns you on, moan as loud as you can, scream down the roof, grunt out load, make them feel pride in pleasuring you. Give them reason to want to do more, be a better lover for you.
  4. Listen your partner: I don’t just mean you should just listen to your partner’s words, I mean you should also listen to your partner’s body too. Pay attention to the details on their body, watch them as you pleasure them, take note of every reaction to your every touch. Know when to stop and when to add more pressure. Listening and paying attention to your partner’s body is very important when it comes to pleasuring them.
  5. Read books/watch and listen to podcasts from experts: Listen, reading books broadens the mind. You gain more knowledge, wisdom when you read. And seeing as sex is an important part of our lives as humans, it is required that we read books on sex to better know and understand how we are and why we are the way we are. To better understand our different sexual preferences and why that is so. Read books to better understand your partner and their needs as well. Listen to podcast, watch videos and learn more on how to better your experiences in bedroom with your partner.
  6. Dress to please your partner: This is for my ladies. Go out and do some intimate shopping. Get some very sexy dresses and lingerie for him. There should be days set aside mainly for the purpose of driving him nuts with want and the way you dress is one of the ways to drive him crazy. It builds anticipation too. And there is no better way to fully enjoy sex than when the anticipation has been building for hours, days…. Because by the time you get down to the actual act, you will both feel like you are about to burst wide open with desire, from the build up and when you eventually orgasm, it will be MIND BLOWING!
  7. Role playing: Throw in a little kink every now then to spice up your relationship and your sexual life. Role playing is very much underated. People need to understand how intimate it is to role play with your partner. Because we all have fantasies and role playing is a way of playing out those wild fantasies. Talk about your fantasies and how you want it to play out and then plan the actual role playing and watch how your sexual life will blossom!

I am sure there are a millions of other ways to spice up your sexual life, but these are just the few I can come up with for now, we may have to visit it again and add a few more tips. But for now, try these out and watch what happens.

If you are yet to find your confidence sexually, then try to read books, watch sex experts discuss on how to know your body and also know your partners body too. Try on sexy underwear, lingerie, sexy dresses, see how you feel in them. Build up your imagination, find your own fantasy and then communicate them with your partner.

Y’all need to stop having mediocre sex and then complain about your sexual life. It goes both ways. Don’t depend on one person to bring you pleasure. Also work on yourself, know yourself and then work on knowing your partner and their sexual preferences. Put in the work. You both need to put in the work. Because only then will you be able to experience mind blowing sexual experiences with your partner.

That’s it for now on this topic. Thank you for spending A Moment With Jennie by reading this lovely article. Let us spend more intimate time together in the next article. Thanks for reading!

An Open Relationship/Marriage; Yay Or Nay?

An open relationship; Yay or Nay?

Hello!

Welcome to another interesting topic on A Moment With Jennie. Let’s have some fun while reading this particular article. Because a lot of men will not agree with this one! A lot of men will develop a migraine and some will pop out veins from their temple if they ever come across this article. But still, ENJOY!

I was on instagram recently and I saw a post on a celebrity page on how open marriages and relationships should be normalized. Apparently said celebrity was bitter because her partner had been cheating on her but she could not leave him because she ‘loves him so much’. So she chose to come rant on instagram about how men would not take half the things she dish out to women and how she wishes open marriages and relationships could be normalized.

Ha! Let us open up that relationship! Open up that marriage y’all! My ladies are suffering!!! They are in chains and shackles! Grant them their freedom! Free them from that prison! They no longer want to be prisoners to your bullshit!(please excuse my french!) Open up that marriage!

No man wants to hear this; ‘Let’s try having an open marriage/relationship’. No man wants to live with the image of another man having sex with their woman, and that is a fact! Men want to have the freedom to flirt at will, sleep around, and be promiscuous all they want but once they hear that another man is flirting with their woman, or being overly nice to their woman, not to even mention sleeping with their woman, they go ballistic and they see red. Why? Because they are territorial and jealous.

But guess what? Women are fed up! They are tired of constantly being on the receiving end of wandering penises. And that’s why there is a rise in the amount of women that cheat on their partners lately. Which is very alarming. Because these men have managed to wake up the beasts in these women. They have made these women unleash a part of them they have been holding down for so long. They no longer want to be the victims, they no longer want to cry themselves to sleep every night. They no longer want to be tied down in the hell that their partners have created for them. They want to be free and if they manage to get that freedom, it will be bloody and bad for these men. And the best part is, these men know it! They know how humiliating it would be to them and their ego if their wives/girlfriends have the freedom to do as they please.

Should couples entertain the idea of an open relationship/marriage?

What is good for the goose is also good for the gander! So, yes. I think it’s time a lot of couples start thinking about the thought and the possibility of an open marriage or an open relationship. Because, why not? If you have a wondering penis, maybe this will help you curb your appetite and thirst for external female companion. Think about it!

If more women start start summing up the courage to express their interests in open marriages and relationships, maybe these men will start being smart and stop being foolish with their nasty act of infidelity. The fear of another man touching their women, sleeping with their women will make them develop very strict self discipline. Maybe, just maybe.

Let us quickly note that there are lots of couples in the world today who are already engaged in this act (the beauty of an open relationship or marriage). They are already enjoying the benefits of having an open marriage or/and open relationship. No body is stressing over anybody doing whatever, nobody is hiding their side chicks and side hens. Everybody is being open with their sexual desires and sexual exploits. And there is peace in the home and peace in the relationship and every body is happy!

Believe me when I say this; I am having so much fun writing this article. It is exciting and exhiliratting to know that a lot of people (men in particular) will read this article and curse me out. But it’s fine. Because then you will know that you can’t always have it your way. The ones that want to Always have it their way feel threatened by smart, bold and confident women and end up marrying young naive girls/women they can control at will. But the best part of this case is that, once these young naive girls are no longer so young and no longer naive, they turn out to be the worse nightmare of these men because then they will see for themselves how their once upon a time young and naive wives have turn out to be worse than those smart, bold and confident women they are afraid to marry. Isn’t life beautiful!

One thing men fail to know and understand is that women get horny too! And a handful of times women tend to have higher sex drive than men do. But they choose to have control over their sexual urges. They choose not to disrespect their men. They choose not to belittle their relationship and their partner. They choose to have discipline. Which is something these cheating men tend to over look and take for granted. Same way men go out there and admire a woman with tiny waist, big boobs and ass is the same way a woman sees a talk, dark and handsome man with the perfect physique and admire him. The same way men admire how beautiful other women are is the same way women admire how good looking other men are. Same way these men admire the smile and sweet voice of other women is the same way women admire the sexy smile and the sexy baritone of other men. Same way men undress women in their minds and see themselves in several sexual positions with these women is the same way women undress these sexy, beautifully built, muscled men with very sexy dimples and pantie dropping smiles in their minds and imagine these men having their way with them 7days to sunday! Again, what is good for the goose is also good for the gander!

Now, let’s talk about the benefits of an open marriage/relationship;

  1. When you open up your marriage/relationship, the constant nagging will stop. No body will wonder where you are or who you are with or what you are doing. Your woman will give you the space you crave so much. Because then she is getting the desired attention from other women who can’t seem to get enough of her. She probably won’t even think of you while she’s with them. Because she already knows you are out there somewhere, having a swell time with another woman. Because let me tell you, one thing women crave the most in every relationship is attention. Once she’s getting that as much as she desires, she won’t even bother you any more.
  2. Ladies, once you have the freedom to do as you please, the freedom to admire other men and have at them, you will no longer cry yourself to sleep. You will no longer cry in the shower or wet your pillows(those poor things!) Because you will be too exhausted to even remember how to cry. You will have access to different variety of men to choose from, admire and take home any one of them and be happy with yourself at the end of it all. So, why else would you want to cry?
  3. Men, once you start enjoying the beauty of an open marriage or relationship, you no longer need to hide your many affairs. You no longer need to hide in the toilet, whispering on the phone late at night. You can always talk to anyone on the phone at will and without worry because she already knows what’s going on and she is probably doing the same!

But as interesting and fun as it is to be in an open relationship, it is also not always a good idea. Because once people hear of your relationship preference, they start to talk, they make fun of you and your partner and this brings all manner of disrespect to you and your partner and even to those around you because then Every body knows!

There is also the danger of the woman falling pregnant and not knowing who the father is, especially if she’s had too many sexual partners.

If you want to open up your marriage and relationship, set rules and make sure every body follows those rules, once anyone of the rules is broken, the door to the relationship/marriage comes back up (with chains and padlock!)

Just know that the moment you open up the door to your marriage or relationship, you are opening your relationship or marriage and yourself up to all manner of things. People will disrespect your union(if you are married). People will disrespect your partner time and again without apologizing because you gave them the liberty to do so. And they will disrespect you and laugh at you, make fun of you and call you stupid and foolish.

My advise to you is this; Get a partner that is on the same page as you. Get a partner that understands what you want and you both need to respect each other, respect your relationship and protect your relationship at all cost! Protect yourself and your partner at all cost!

I know for a fact that, very few men will want to have an open marriage/relationship. Because men are very special beings. They want all the glory, all the freedom, all the privilege to themselves.

That’s it on this particular topic. Thank you for spending A Moment With Jennie. Let this article and the words in them help you make the right decision on this matter. Let’s meet again and spend more intimate time together in the next article. Thanks for reading!

Is Cheating Grounds For A Break Up?

Is cheating grounds for a break up?

Hello!
Welcome to another exciting article on A Moment With Jennie. We are back to the cheating topic and This time with more sauce. With the words and thoughts I’ll be sharing in this article, I hope someone reading it will be helped if they are stuck in a situation like this. Enjoy!

Okay. The topic is actually a valid question and a lot of people will have different answers for it. But at the end of the day, your happiness is all that matters. Your mental health is very important.

Before you answer that question though, you need to ask yourself another question:

Can you deal with the stress and hassle that comes with dating a cheating partner?

Can your heart handle the pain, knowing that your partner is a serial ‘cheater’?

Will you be able to sleep well at night knowing that your partner may be somewhere with someone that isn’t you, having sex or having fun while you are back home struggling to sleep and crying yourself to sleep?

Will you be comfortable being intimate with them knowing that there is a high chance of them transmitting some kinda STD to you from their various encounter with different sexual partners?

If you can be totally sincere with yourself and be confident with your answers to these questions, then you will know whether or not to break up with your partner because they cheated on you.

But let’s be sincere with ourselves, no body wants a cheating partner. But a lot of people would be with a cheating man/woman who can foot their bills than be with a decent faithful partner who can’t take care of their immediate financial needs.

It’s really shameful that the world we live in today is a world where women will comfortably stay with a man who abuses them physically, mentally and emotionally, cheats on them, disrespects them because he has the money to sponsor their ‘baby girl lifestyle’. There is no peace in the relationship, there is no love in the relationship, there is no happiness in the relationship. It is sad but that is the life a lot of women have chosen for themselves.

Because let’s be truthful, this topic is mainly for the women. No man will stay with a woman that cheats on him. Men love their ego more than anything else in this world. Once their wife or girlfriend cheats on them, they are sending her packing immediately. Women are the ones shamelessly putting up with men that cheat on them. And the worse part is, you will hear excuses like ‘his womanizing ways is his only fault’. I said this before, cheating is not a fault! It is pure wickedness! You are busy making excuses for him while he is busy giving you different STDs on a regular basis. Who are you deceiving if not yourself?

This goes back to the topic of self love and self worth. If you love yourself enough, if you appreciate and respect yourself enough, if you know your worth and value as a woman, there is no way you will want to put up with a man that cheats on you and disrespects you.

Is cheating grounds for break up?

YES PLEASE.

Think of your sanity and your peace of mind. There is no way you will be happy with a partner that cheats. You can’t trust them. You will always wonder what they are doing, who they are with, you will keep having sleepless nights. Not to mention the various medication you will take as a result of his cheating ass. Be wise!

There are very rare ocassions where it can be understood if a woman refuses to leave a relationship or marriage because he cheated on her. And that’s if there are children involved. Mothers would not want to have their children have the stigma of coming from a broken home. So they sacrifice their own happiness for their children’s happiness. No mother would want to put their children through the emotional and mental trauma of having both parents divorced and living separately. It’s best for children to have both parents living together under the same roof, especially when they are still young and growing. I can understand if this is the case. But if you are not married to him and he cheats, baby girl kindly take a walk and live your life to the fullest. You will definitely find a man that will love and respect you enough to stay faithful to you.

Don’t let anybody deceive you with words like ‘you have to endure. If you leave him, another girl will come in immediately and it will be your loss’. Big fat lie! It’s never a loss for you to leave a man that shamelessly cheats on you. It’s his loss of losing an amazing woman like you because he can’t keep his pants zipped.

Always put yourself first in every situation. Your peace of mind, your sanity, your happiness, your mental well being should always come first. If you stay with him, knowing who he is and what he does when you are not with him, you can’t be happy. Neither will you be at peace in your relationship. And whatever work you have had done on yourself will come crumbling down because someone you care for and love so much is working really hard to destroy your happiness and your peace of mind. You don’t treat him with such disrespect, why let him disrespect you like that? You are better than all of that. He does not deserve you, neither does he deserve your love.

In summary; Yes, cheating is grounds for a break up. You deserve better than what a cheating partner has to offer you. You are beautiful, you are smart, you are hardworking and successful, you are worthy of love and affection and respect from any man you go into a relationship with. Most of all, you are loved at home by your family and your friends cherish you and respects the woman that you are. Never you stay shackled to a man who does not love you as much as your family does. Stay away from any man that does not respect or cherish you like your peers do. When looking for a partner, make sure it’s a man that can add value to you and your life in every way. He has to add to the love you feel for yourself, he has to add to the happiness you already have, he has to add your value and your self worth. He has no right to subtract from your joy and happiness or mental wellness. If he can’t be faithful to you, take a walk because he does not deserve you to begin with. Any man that won’t consider your happiness in a relationship is a man that is yet to love himself or work on his self worth. If he takes out time to love himself and be happy with himself first, then he would appreciate the joy and the bliss of being with one woman and remain faithful to her.

Believe me sis, you will find a man that will see you, see your value as a woman and respect you. You will find that man for you. Set your standards, set your value, set your goal and stick to what you want for yourself. You will be a whole lot happier with yourself if you refuse to remain in a relationship that threatens your happiness.

Men are not foolish and that’s why they won’t ever stay with a woman that cheats on them. They know how wrong their actions are, they know the kind of hurt they cause their partners, they know the damage they bring to their relationships with their actions, so it is left for you to stand your ground and refuse anything less than that they will be willing to accept from a partner. Which is why They will never accept an open relationship or marriage(another topic for another article).

I really hope my words in this article will give you the courage you need to stop being an emotional punching bag, to stop enabling a cheating partner, to stop making excuses for a cheating partner and also give you the courage to make up your mind to want better for yourself and walk away from that man that has no respect for you or your sanity!

That will be all for now on this topic. Thank you for spending A Moment With Jennie, let us spend more intimate time together in the next article. Thanks for reading!

Dating Him/Her Flaws And All!

Dating Him/Her Flaws And All:

Hello!

Welcome to another article on A Moment With Jennie. In this article, I’ll be discussing the many challenges that comes with being in a romantic relationship. The many times our patients and sanity will be put to the test while in a romantic relationship. And as usual, I hope my words help someone out there as they read. Enjoy!

Someone once said to me: ‘ You won’t ever find a man that’s 100%, no one ever finds a partner that is 100%. Because nobody is 100%. If you want to have a successful relationship, you have to love them and accept their flaws just as you would like them to love you and accept your flaws’. Now, these are very deep words! And I agree with them. Every word that person said to me is the gospel.

First: Nobody is 100%, no body is perfect. Humans were not created to be perfect beings. We were created to thrive to be better than other creatures. And as such, we need to recognize our faults and work on them. Not just work on them because we want to be in a relationship, but work on them for ourselves and for the people around us.

I always tell People, you need to work on yourseld first before you go into any relationship. And part of working on yourself is recognizing and identifying your flaws and your faults, accepting them and then begin to work on getting rid of them, begin to work on being better for you and for your loved ones.

When you spend time working on yourself, you will be in a good position to give corrections, call people out on their nasty attitudes and set them on the right part. But when you have dozens of faults of your own, how will you be able to correct someone else? They won’t even pay attention to you. Because you are not the right person to correct them. Go work on you first, and then you can earn the right to correct others.

Now, back to the topic: Loving him/her faults and all.

Well, you literally have no choice but to love your partner faults and all. Because again, no human is perfect.

We all have at least one fault linked to us. Do you wish to be dumped for that flaw? No, what we wish for is to find that one person crazy about us enough to love us completely and totally, accept our flaws and our faults, hold on to us and never lets us go. Now same thing goes for everyone else in the world. You should be willing and ready to accept their faults just as you would want them to accept yours, love you through it all, love you despite those flaws. You should be ready and willing to do same for them.

There exceptions to accepting his/her faults and flaws and loving them despite these. Do not put yourself in danger all in the name of loving someone flaws and all. Do not hurt yourself, deliberately let them hurt you because you want to love them flaws and all. Don’t set yourself up for ruine because you want to be seen as an understanding partner. Don’t be stupid please.

There are exempted cases when it comes to loving him/her flaws and all. I’ll try to capture the core of these cases in the next paragraph:

  1. When he/she is abusive, be it physical, emotional or mental abuse,don’t ever make excuses for them. Run out of that relationship as quickly as you can. The moment you sense any sign of abuse from your partner, take a walk. Nobody is worth that amount of mental and emotional and physical pain, all in the name of love. And never you make excuses for an abusive partner. Never you do that! Being abusive is not a fault, it is not a flaw, it is a mental disorder. That person needs professional help, not you. You are not a doctor, you are not a shrink. And even if you are one, let them get help from someone who is not romantically involved with them. If you are a psychiatrist, you should know better than to enable an abuser. Abuse of any kind; Emotional, mental or physical abuse is not something you should ever be willing to accept from anybody because you ‘love’ them. Because if they can cause pain, they don’t love you and you should not be with anyone that does not love you. Love is not painful. Don’t accept pain from anyone in the name of being a supportive partner or a caring partner. Be wise!
  2. A cheating partner is not a partner with flaws/faults. A cheating partner is a wicked partner. Stay away from them. Don’t try to understand. Don’t make excuses for them. Don’t accept their nastiness. Don’t even listen them when they try to make excuses. Walk and walk as fast as you can. Run if you must. Because cheating is another form of abuse, it causes emotional and mental pain. That is emotional and mental abuse. If they do it once, they are going to do it again. If you forgive them once, they will expect you to forgive them again and continue to forgive them until they suck out all the energy in you. Don’t make excuses for a cheating partner, they are NOT worth it. Be wise!
  3. A partner that disrects you is not a partner that has faults. A partner that disprects you is a person that does not love you. Love comes with respect for each other. If he loves you, he will respect you all day everyday! And he will never accept anyone who disrespects you either. Because no man wants to watch other people disrespect his woman, unless he has zero regard for her. Same goes for women. A woman that loves you will never disrespect you or make you feel less of a man. And she would never want anyone to disrespectil her man. Don’t accept, take or tolerate any form of disrespect from anybody, especially someone you are romantically involved with.
  4. Being dumb/stupid is not a flaw neither is it a fault. Don’t even consider the possibility of being in a relationship with a dumb or stupid partner. Why out yourself through that shame? Why be with someone you can’t rely on or even introduce to your family and friends out of fear of them embarrassing you? A person that does not think before they speak is a dangerous person, stay off! This person will continue to surprise you as to how dumb and stupid they can get by the day. These type of people are the ones that act like they are smarter than everyone else, they never take corrections. They never accept they wrong in anyway. They claim to right all the time. They spew all sorts of nonsense on a daily basis, qouting people just to come off as smart without even understanding said quotes. This is not a fault, don’t… Never put up with this, for your own sanity.
  5. Being a mama’s boy is not a fault. No, he needs to go back home and be with his mother. You are not bis mother. Don’t try to mother him. A grown man that has to constantly rely on his mother for everything does not need a girlfriend. Don’t try to understand him, you never will. Don’t try to baby him, you will only regret it Because it shall only end in tears. Don’t try to change him, let him recogboze that he has a problem and change himself for himself.
  6. A woman that has daddy issues isn’t a woman with a fault. It’s woman with serious problems and what she needs is a therapist, not a boyfriend. Do not try to understand her, do not trt to change her, let her get the help she needs while she still can. Because if you nake the mistake of trying to understand her, accept her, change her, help her, love her through it, you will only end up regretting and it shall end in tears. Just leave her be. She needs to recognize her problems and get the necessary help she needs.

If you accept any of this from the beginning of your relationship, you will have to keep accepting them for the duration of the relationship. Because if they can do it one time and you put up with it, they will expect you to keep putting up with it and they will never change. And frankly though, it is not your place to try and change anybody. Let them nake up their mind to change on their own, only then will they cherish and value their growth.

There are genuine flaws and faults that can be excused and the ones I mentioned above are not part of them. Don’t start making excuses for people when you are not supposed to. Don’t hurt yourself by being with people who need professional help with their issuess. They need to heal first before thinking about being in a relationship.

They are dirty and lazy, they find it hard to clean the house or wash the dishes or cook.

They have bad phone manners.

They have anger issues(this is broad and subjective)

They have bad spending habits. They are not financially cautious or disciplined.

They are insecure about their emotions, about you, about themselves.

And there are the few minor ones that are not even worth mentioning, these are faults and flaws that can be fixed by your partners in a relationship. These are flaws you can accept and help correct. Let’s know what is right and wrong, what to accept and what not to accept.

That’s it for this article. Thank you for spending A Moment With Jennie. Hope the words on this article will help someone out there who has been enabling abusive and cheating partners to take walk and never look back. Let’s spend more time together in the next article. Thanks for reading!

He Expects Me To Clean And Cook For Him, What Should I Do?

He expects me to clean and cook for him. What should I do?

Hello!
Welcome to another exciting article on A Moment With Jennie. This topic is juicy. And I’ll be sharing my personal experiences as well as my words of advice to help as many people as I can possibly help, do things right for their own comfort and no one elses. Enjoy!

So I was conversing with a friend last night and she was talking about how her new man expects her to come over to his house to clean and wash and cook for him. She could not understand why there should be such expectations in a relationship that is barely months old. Why would he tell her to come and clean for him? It’s his house, he should do the cleaning himself. His clothes are his, he wears them, let him wash them himself. If he is hungry, he should go into the kitchen and cook for himself. Why does he expect her to be his personal maid just because they are in a relationship together? These were the things she was saying to me. She was mad pissed! She felt disrespected and insulted that he would not just insinuate such but demand and expect that she would just come running like a crazy person. Because in her own words ‘Only a crazy woman will put up with such!’.

I could not stop laughing at her expressions. And the whole conversation was funny to me, really. It also reminded me of something a school mate said to me a few years back in the university. There was an active argument going on about if girls should clean and cook for their boyfriends and this beautiful lady stood up and said ‘How can you go to your boyfriend’s house and not clean or cook? Same guy that has sex with you without protection and ‘releases’ inside you? If you don’t do that, then you are not ready to be in a relationship’. Well, that was the day I knew lots of women are letting men have sex with them without protection. That was also the day I knew a lot of women enable these women. That same day, I found out that not being able to clean and cook for a man means you are not ready for a relationship.

Listen to me, when you start off something in a relationship (could an act, a tone, a habit, a routine) right from the beginning of the relationship, it is expected that you carry on with it for the duration of the relationship. Once you start it, you have to keep going. There is no turning point for you. They have gotten comfortable with the routine, the tone, the habit, all of it. So why would want to change a few months, years down the road? They will start demanding those things of you. They will expect it and when you don’t do it, it’s a fault on your part. That thing becomes your responsibility.

If at the beginning of a relationship you as a man buys her expensive gifts and flowers, you plan and take mini vacations every other weekend, you take her out to fancy restaurants a few nights a week, you call her 5times a day, text her in between those calls, always let her know where you are and who you are with, just know that these acts have automatically become your responsibilities because she will keep expecting them from you and when you don’t do them you have failed to live up to your responsibility as a man in the relationship. If you can’t and won’t keep up with it, do not start it. Don’t start pampering her just because you are trying to woo her and then stop with the pampering as soon as she is totally yours, don’t do that. If pampering her is your way of showing her your affection, then you must keep showing her your affection the only way you know how to for the duration of your relationship.

And if as a woman, at the beginning of your relationship, you go to his house and clean for him, do his laundry, cook for him, take care of him every weekend, nurse him back to health when he is sick, baby him because he is your ‘baby’, if you do these things from the start then you must continue to do them for the duration of your relationship because he will get used to the way you take care of him and he will expect you to come over every weekend to clean and cook for him, you can’t stop because if you do, then you have failed in your responsibility as a woman in the relationship. If you were doing these things at the beginning of your relationship because you want to leave a good impression on him and make him keep you, and then stop doing them the moment you guys are officially a couple, then you should have yourself to blane when he complains or demands and expects this treatment from you on a regular basis.

A lot of women go into relationships and begin to treat men the way they watched their mothers treat their fathers, and they forget that these men are not guaranteed to be their husbands. They are not certain of how long the relationship will last for, they just go in and start playing the role of a house wife. And these men get comfortable to this style and treatment they receive. And go into every relationship expecting the same treatment from their women.

I am not against cleaning and cooking for your man. I am not against you being a good girlfriend to your man but honey, the reason for doing these things is what I am against. If your reason for doing house chores at his place is just so he will keep you and marry you later on, then you need to stop dreaming. You need to stop deceiving yourself and wake up! No amount of cleaning and cooking will make a man marry you. Because there is a 99.9% chance that the woman he’ll end up marrying would not even know how to cook or clean, while you are busy breaking your back and slaving away in the kitchen, sweating and trying to make the best dish for him will only end up with you being an ex. Be careful ladies. We need to be very mindful of the wisdom behind our actions.

Now, pay attention to my next words: If you go to your man’s house and you see the place is not as clean as you would expect it to be or you see how poorly he’s been feeding and you feel the need to clean and cook, then go right ahead. Because in the end you will be more comfortable in a clean environment, you will be eating from the meal too. And above all, never expect anything in return. And please do not make it habit. Because then it becomes your duty and your responsibility to always cook and clean whenever you are around. You let him know you don’t like how dirty his place is, let him make an effort to clean up when he knows you are coming over. And just to be clear, if he cares about you enough, he will make an effort to clean up and prepare for your arrival, just FYI.

So, in the case of my friend who was furious at the ‘audacity’ of her man to expect her to come over and clean and cook, I believe the man has previously been with women who do these things for him and now expects every woman he dates to do same without complains. And before people start going off on her, he didn’t suggest she comes over and do these things, he didn’t ask if she was comfortable or okay doing these things for him, he demanded that she comes over and take care of his house chores for him. It was more about his word was gospel and nothing else could counter it. Wrong. He is so wrong and same thing goes to the many men who go about expecting these things from women. If you need a maid, get a maid. If you beed a chef, get a chef. If you need your clothes laundered, take them to the laundry. Don’t put unnecessary pressure on these women all in the name of being in a committed relationship.

Lots of women do these things for the wrong reasons and that is why they end up hurt and heart broken when the relationship ends. Because they feel like they have invested so much only to be disappointed in the end. But it’s not the man’s fault. It is your fault for slaving for a man when you should not and for doing these things for all the wrong reasons too.

Like I said before, if you want to clean for him and cook for him, go right ahead. Just don’t go and start expecting a ring for cooking and cleaning. Clean and cook because you want to, because you want to feed him, because you feel the need to with no expectations in mind.

And men, please stop demanding these things from your women. Ask her if she can do these things and be very grateful if she does them for you. Because it really is not easy to clean and cook for someone else. If it were easy, why don’t you do them yourself rather than demand they do it for you?

That’s it for this topic. We may have to visit it again. But really, let’s be mindful of the things we do and the expectations we have of other people. Thank you for spending A Moment With Jennie, I hope this article has been helpful to you. Let us spend more intimate time together in the next article. Thanks for reading!

Cheating: A choice, Never A Mistake.

Cheating: A choice, Never A Mistake….

Hello!
Welcome to another article on A Moment With Jennie. This topic right here is a deep one. There could never be an end to discussions like this one. New arguments come up each day on this topic, different views, different opinions, different excuses…. Hmmm. Well, I’ve come with the gospel as always, to air my views, my ideas, my thoughts and hope someone out there, reading this will and can relate to the things I’ve written. Enjoy!

Cheating is exactly what it is, cheating. There is no excuse for it, there is no explanation for it. It is what it is. It is a decision you make, it is a choice to involve in the act of infidelity. It is a choice to intentionally defile whatever bond you share with your partner. It is a decision you make to ruin the beauty of your relationship. There is no excusing your actions. And don’t even try to say it is a mistake, because then you’ll only look stupid.

Many people, when they cheat or after they cheat, they make silly excuses like ‘it is a mistake’. No, it is never a mistake. There is the temptation to cheat, there is the choice to cheat. When you are being faced with the temptation, you have probably seconds, minutes, hours and sometimes days to think about what you are about to do. The moment you stop thinking and start doing, that’s when the choice has been made. The choice to cheat. So, it is never a mistake. Not when you do it the first time and definitely not when you repeat the same act.

Cheating partners don’t seem to care about the emotional and mental trauma, pain they put their partners through when they cheat. Not to mention the many STDs and STIs they bring back home to their partners. I have seen first hand the damage infidelity has brought to many homes and families, individuals and relationships. Makes me wonder why these people bother going into serious relationships or even getting married! Why put someone else through all this pain and agony?

Let’s discuss some damages caused by the choice cheating partners make;

1: When you cheat on your partner you break the trust they had in you. They no longer see you the same they used to. Whenever you leave the house, whenever you are not there physically with them, whenever you ignore a phone call, a text message, whenever you use excuses like ‘I’m busy/I was busy’ ‘ I was sleeping’ ‘I’m in a meeting’ etc, your partner automatically assumes snd believes that you are spending time with someone else, cheating on them ‘as usual’. It no longer matters if you are being sincere or not, that trust is gone, broken, shattered, could never be restored. Even if they forget, they will never forget.

  1. Cheating partners are the reason there are too many children from broken homes, broken families today. The effect of their action not only hurt nor harm their partners, it hurts and harms their children too, the entire family. And if the children eventually finds out about them cheating, they lose whatever respect they had for them as their parents. Your choice to cheat, to have a few minutes of bliss, of pleasurable orgasmic fulfilment will end up destroying something as precious as your family.
  2. When cheating becomes a habit to people, your spirituality suffers. Because let me tell you this, you are not just cheating on your partner, you are cheating yourself and you are cheating God as well. You are sharing a part of you with people that you are not supposed to. Your spiritual journey and growth begins to surfer, and eventually you find yourself in place of ruine. Your God no longer listens to you, you even find it hard to pray, your partner no longer trusts you, your children, family and peers no longer respects, so what is left of you exactly?
  3. Let’s talk about the many diseases you bring home to your partner. And how is it that the person cheating isn’t always the one that surfers from their actions? Their partners and those around them surfers the outcome of their actions. I know of a woman who is currently battling with the knowledge that she is now HIV possitive, thanks to her cheating husband. She cries day and night, spends money on medication while her children surfers from lack of attention from their mother. This man single handedly brought destruction to his home. And there hundreds if not thousands of families like this out there.
  4. When you cheat you make your partners question themselves. They wonder if they are the reason their partner is cheating. They wonder if there is something they are doing wrong or something they are not doing right, they search themselves day and night, wondering if they are to be blamed for their partners cheating on them. Some even come up with excuses for the nasty behaviour of their partners. When you go out there and make the choice to cheat on your partner, you mess them up in such a way that could almost never be repairable.
  5. A man or woman that has previously been with a cheating partner, goes out into the world believeing every man or woman they meet to be the same as their ex. They have little urge to trust or even believe the things people say. ‘They are all the same’ ‘ Men are scum’ ‘ Women lie’. We hear these lines everyday. People don’t jusy wake up and say these things just for the fun of it. They say these things out of their personal experiences with cheating and lying men and women.
  6. When you cheat and get caught in the act, you cause a great amount of emotional and mental pain to your partners. You hurt them in a way that only you can. You take them and their affection for you for granted, they trash their trust on you. They surfer in silence. They blame themselves. They think of themselves as not enough. Some women have been so scarred for so long that they now believe ‘It’s nornal for men to cheat’. And it is all thanks to their cheating partner, they are yet to meet a real man who sees only them, who respects them enough to fight off every temptation that tries to come between them, who loves them enough to have a great sense of responsibility and self descipline. There are lots of emotionally damaged women and men out their, all as a result of being unfortunate enough to meet a cheating partner.

People need to understand the kind of hurt and damage they cause other people because of the stupid decision they make when they go ahead and cheat on their partners. You hurt them in a way that cuts deep and probably may never heal.

You need to understand that, everybody has the opportunity to cheat, the chance to ‘enjoy’ themselves in the arms of other people. But they choose not to, out of respect for their partners, out of the self discipline they have mastered because they want to remain true to one person.

You don’t have the upper hand when you cheat. Instead you are the fool who shares himself/herself with countless other people. There is nothing special about that, that is not something to boast about. You should cover your face in shame because you lack the self respect, the self love, the discipline and self control to be true and faithful to one person.

People don’t seem to understand the amount of joy, happiness and fulfilment that comes with being faithful and true to one person. Giving them your all, respecting them just as they respect you. Loving them and trusting them, believing them and giving them reason to do the same to you and for you. The bliss that comes with all of this is immeasurable.

The idea of cheating disgusts me. And I have zero respect for people that cheat. Even if they are my friends or family member or someone close to me. It is disgusting and even irritating to know that people who cheat with clearless abandone are close to me, but unfortunately, that seems to be the case. And I have personally seen their partners surfer from this in the worse way possible. A lot of people I know cheat with pride, like there is a badge of honour that comes with cheating. They cheat without remorse, with no hope of ever changing or being better for themselves. They want to keep doing the same thing till the day they die. Without a care for how their partner, family and the people around them feels.

I’m done talking on this topic. It even angers me just writing on it. If you have ever cheated or is currently cheating or you are planning to cheat, I hope that when you come across this article, you would read and understand the harm your action is bringing not just to you but to the people in your life. Thank you for spending A Moment With Jennie, let’s spend more intimate time together in the next article. Thanks for reading!

First Date Questions And Topics;

First Date Questions And Topics:

Hello!
Welcome to another exciting article on A Moment With Jennie. This will be brief but enlightening. I just need to touch on this topic because there are lots of expectations on certain individuals when it comes to the things to talk about on a first date or the questions to ask on the first date. As usual, I hope to help as many people as I can with my words, ideas and thoughts with this article. Enjoy!

First thing you need to understand is this: The first date is not a job interview. We need to understand that the first date is not where you determine if you will marry this person or not. The first date is not the time to talk about certain things like finances. The first date is the first step you take towards starting a new relationship. The first date will only determine whether or not you will like to go on a second date with that person. The first date only requires soft, simple questions. Just to get to know basic details about this person. Don’t go dumping hard difficult questions on them on the first date, if you do that you will only end up looking like a fool.

People make the mistake of treating the first date like a job interview. While I understand the need and the reason behind this, I also need to caution people on how they come on too strong on the first date with their questions.

Is some cases, the first date for some people is when they will be meeting in person for the first time, so yeah, I understand the need to ask some questions that may be too serious or may come off as too strong. But still, it is the first time you are meeting this person in the flesh, why not chill, relax and just enjoy their company. Enjoy the good food, joke around a bit, flirt a little, laugh at each other’s joke even if they are not funny, just have fun. Why ruin what could be a good meeting with questions and conversations that will only offend and insult the other person? Why not just save the serious, strong conversations and questions for the next time you meet?

Below are a few topics or questions that should NEVER come up on the first date;

1.Never talk about your financies on the first date. No, don’t ever do that. You will only end up spoiling the mood. What is the wisdom behind talking about or asking questions about your financies on the first date? What do you aim to gain at the end of that conversation? This is a conversation for when you know that you are both getting serious with each other. When you know deep within you that you are both on the same page as to where you want the relationship to go, how further you both want to go in the relationship. When you know you both want to take things to ‘the next level’, then you can talk about your financies. Because finance is very important in every serious relationship, you can’t have one person leeching off the other, or one person being a burden to the other person or have one person feeling inadequate because they feel they earn or have less than the other. Or in most cases, you can’t have one person footing the bill all the time, what’s the fun in that? A healthy, happy, successful relationship is when both parties have something to offer equally. He foots the bill today, you foot the bill tomorrow. He gets you something good today, the following week or month you go out and buy him something good too which he will cherish. And there is also a level of pride that comes with having a financially independent partner. Think about that.

  1. Never boast about your achievements or success or places you have been to or even your assets on the first date. No No. Never do that. Men are particularly fond of this act. They come on the first date and talk about houses they own, cars they have driven or currently own, places they have been to, how many countries or cities in the world they have travelled to just to try and impress her. Why would you want to do that? What makes you think boasting about how many zeros are in your bank account or how many houses and cars you own would impress her? This conversation should be saved for the next date or for the next 20 dates. I can’t even understand why you would feel the need to boast about your assets. Let her see for herself what you have achieved. Let her ask you about them. Don’t offer to share the details without being asked. And ladies also make the mistake of boasting about their achievements and success because they feel the need to be applauded, to be respected, to be seen as equals, and in some cases to be feel superior to the man. How is that a smart thing to do? It is the first date, none of this is required, they are not necessary at all. Just go in there, be yourself, be the you that your family and friends know and love. Let him love you just the way you are. Don’t feel the need to show off unnecessarily.
  2. Never talk about your ex or exes! Please, I beg you never talk about your exes on the first date. He does not want to hear that. She is not interested in the details. I understand you don’t want to make same mistakes you made in your past relationships. I understand you don’t want your next partner to be like your ex. I understand the need to want to do better. But please save the exes conversation for later in the future when there is a need to talk about it. He/she may ask you about your past relationships and why it didn’t work out, then you can give the details. But definitely not on the first date. Never on the first date.
  3. ‘Where do you see yourself in 5, 10 years?’ ‘What are you bringing to the table?’ : Avoid these questions and its likes at all cost! Never you ask these questions on the First date. The only thing that should be on any table on your first date is the food and drink you will both be consuming that evening or afternoon (depending on the time of the day it is). You should only worry about where you see yourself in the next 10 minutes to 1hour of the date with that person. Don’t go further than that. This person has no business knowing where you see yourself in the next 5-10yrs, this person has no business telling you where they see themselves in the next 5-10yrs and they have no business bringing anything to any table on this particular date!

Please, let us try and not complicate things for ourselves. Even if you have been talking to this person for months or even years, the fact that you are meeting them in person for the first time ever means they are still a stranger to you! Why would you want to share such intimate details with them? And why would expect them to share intimate details about themselves with you?

The first date like I said earlier is for you both to sit down, chill, get to know each other. Ask about their hobbies, their favorite food, favorite colour, favorite music, favorite movie, favorite actor, favorite artist, which school or schools they attended, you can ask them questions about their family, like how many siblings they have, if both parents are still together. Talk about a movie you have both seen, your personal interests or mutual interests. Talk about some crazy things you have both done as teenagers or as children or young adults. Just sit back, have a fun time chatting about silly but interesting things. And at the end of the date you decide if you want to go on a second date with them or not.

I don’t really need to talk more on this topic. I want to believe I’ve gotten my message across, the best way I can. Let’s stop with the crazy expectations on first dates and stop boring people With serious conversations and questions.

That will be all for now on this topic. I may decided to visit it again. Thank you for spending A Moment With Jennie, I hope I’ve been able to briefly enlighten as many people as I can on the kinds of conversations and questions to have and ask and those to avoid. Let’s spend more intimate time together in the next article. Thanks for reading!

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